As a mom, it often feels like the day just doesn’t have enough time – I often get up early to find a quiet moment to work and stay up late folding laundry and preparing breakfast. Especially with small children underfoot, I long for time to enjoy something just for myself. So with Mother’s Day coming up, I went to my Instagram to see how other moms want to be valued and to see what they think is the best gift for my mom– and the results are there!
Read on for my unofficial polls showing the top three ways moms want to (actually) be celebrated. The answers might surprise you.
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Alone time. Let’s face it, most of us have had a fair amount of family time over the past year. So it’s not surprising that mothers want to spend some time alone or with their friends on this Mother’s Day. Don’t get me wrong, we all love hanging out with our kids, but with WFH and homeschooling, most moms need a break before they * literally * break! Whether you’re booking a hotel stay, sending it to the spa, or leaving it in the house for the day alone, consider time alone as a great option for your mom.
What you give mom is the chance to refuel and refill her tank. Be thoughtful in your approach. If you want to leave her alone at home, make sure you have a clean house to relax in. Maybe leave a prepackaged meal or Postmates gift card, So you don’t have to cook anything! Get creative – if you send them to a hotel or spa, make sure you send a small card or note in their pocket so they know how much you appreciate them and recognize their contribution to the family.
I also wanted to mention that this is especially important for all of the single mothers out there. If you know anyone, I encourage you to go out of your way to offer help. It can be so easy to invite your kids to play for two hours so they can shower in peace. Or offer to cook a meal for your children and take them out for dinner. The gesture will be appreciated and you will get some karma points as well.
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Spend time in nature
This year I realized that moms need to rest and recharge. So it didn’t surprise me how many mothers want to keep it simple with hiking, beach days, kayaking, etc. Harvard Health Research in a growing scientific field called ecotherapy has shown a strong link between time spent in nature and reducing stress, anxiety, and depression. They also state that the connection between the soothing sounds of nature can lower blood pressure and cortisol, the stress hormone.
If getting outdoors on Mother’s Day seems to be a crowded idea to you, consider creating an opportunity to have time in the future to be with your mother in nature. Tickets to a state park or garden paired with A blanket are a nice touch. If you’re a gift giver, try something that could support and nurture their love for the outdoors. Some points to consider are new trail shoes or a Porter water bottle. If mom is more of a fashion fanatic, go for one Fanny pack or Belt pocket so they can be hands-free or a beautiful sun hat. If you want to keep the mood calm, try walking around a garden, reading in the park, or lying on the beach. The list goes on and on, and while the mother of your children may want time to herself, your mother may be fatherly longing for some time with you, especially if you were apart during the COVID.
I also wanted to mention (and this could be a sensitive topic, but I’ll try anyway) if you are an adult in a relationship and always doing things with your significant other, I would encourage you to do a special one-time with yours Mother. While I’m sure your partner is amazing, it must be difficult for your mom to always share her time with someone else. Mothers raise their children for years and most of the time they just want you to meet someone to share your life with. However, that doesn’t mean they don’t crave the one-on-one conversation they used to have with you. This is just a thought an empty nest shared with me once and something I recommended my husband do with his mother. Let’s face it, your partner will always be their baby!
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The bottom line is, mothers want to know that you appreciate them. So many mothers responded with a thoughtful card or note. Unfortunately, my mother passed away years ago, but many women in my life have mothered me in one way or another. whether by modeling and mentoring or by cooking homemade meals for me. Two of my closest friends shared their mothers with me at the times in my life when I need it most.
My grandmother and my aunts also shaped my role as mother significantly, and so did my mother-in-law. Needless to say, I have been blessed with mothers, and it is important to recognize these mothers too. So, this Mother’s Day put pen on paper and let them know about the impact that you have made in your life.
I would like to leave you with one final thought. Mother’s Day can be a tough day for some. Whether your mother has died or you have become estranged, know that on this day I will think of you and send you all the love and light from my heart, because motherhood means to care for and lift all women in their need. Happy Mother’s Day!